"Nemisio, come join us! Let's have some fun... it's my Birthday today! Let's drink to death!" Says one of Nemisio's friends. "Oh, happy birthday! Sorry I can't join you, my kids have homework, I have to assist them". Nemisio replies. "Whoooo, you are always like that, you are full of excuses!"

Fellow Toastmasters, Toastmaster of the night, and to our guests... this dialogue or something to this effect, is a familiar refrain in the life of Mang Nemisio.

Mang Nemisio is my friend, he is our neighbor in Leyte. He is a vinegar maker. For most people, Mang Nemisio is kind of snobbish, a kill joy. But in my view... Mang Nemisio is "selfless". He had deprived himself of the excesses in life. No alcohol, no cigarettes no nothing. He just spends his time doing his job and spends the rest of his waking hours with his family and very close friends.

In one of our last conversations when I was still in the Philippines some 4 or 5 years ago, I asked Mang Nemiso why he doesn't mingle with his comrades on their drinking sessions and why he doesn't drink and smoke at all. He told me that he actually smoked and drank when he was younger but gave up everything when he got married. He really took his roles as father and husband to heart.  He said, “You see, we have barely something to eat, my kids go to school without any allowances, do you think I have a choice? Do you think I have a logical choice? Even if I have a choice I would still choose to serve my family. I'd rather be with my kids and make sure that they grow to be respectful children or at the very least, I would try to spend my time doing something beneficial to others.”

After hearing his answer, I was kind of surprised and quite felt ashamed for my question. Surprised because, to be honest, I was not expecting an answer like that from him and I felt ashamed because my question needed just a common sense to answer. They barely have something to eat… Wow, I should have known better!

Mang Nemisio, with little that he has, was also generous. He shares whatever they have in excess of their family's needs. Our family was a regular beneficiary of fresh vegetables.

As years passed by, Mang Nemisio's sacrifices yielded fruits. Two of his kids have already graduated from college and now are both licensed engineers, one of which is already working in Brunei  and is earning really well. Some are about to finish their degrees as well.

To illustrate how hard it was for Mang Nemisio's kids to have reached this far… not only they have “barely something to eat”, they also don't have water, electricity and at times, they also don't have a roof whenever a huge typhoon hits our region.

Whenever asked, Mang Nemisio's children would always answer that they owe it their parents for raising them to be respectful children who value a good education.

Just when everything was going smoothly for them, a sad incident happened. Mang Nemisio was diagnosed with a disease called tuberculosis of the bone. First time I've heard about this ailment.

And when I went on vacation last month, few days after I arrived, Mang Nemisio died. I did not have the chance to talk to him again.

His family was saying that until the very end, he was still very much concerned about their welfare. He even told his eldest son before his last breath that he feels sorry that his role as a father  has already been assumed by him.

Whenever I am thinking about the life of Mang Nemisio, with the dedication that he gave, I can say that he practically gave up his life, just to ensure that his family members' lives would continue. Was he successful? I certainly believe so.

Friends, being selfless is one of the most noble characters a person can have.  I believe in stepping forward without waiting to be told, in extending one's self without expecting something in return.

Lost money and energy while in the process of helping others be it your family, friends or even a stranger, can still be recovered. Money can be earned again. Just take a rest or have a sleep and your energy will be recharged. But the opportunity to make a difference on others, if we will not do it now while we are still young and capable... we might not be able to do it at all.

I am not losing hope. I even have this feeling that my hope in Filipinos will outlive me. I will die but my hope in you will linger. I believe there is Mang Nemisio in each and everyone of us... just waiting to be unleashed.

Fellow Toastmasters, friends... unleash the Mang Nemisio in you and be selfless.
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